The following in an excerpt from a children’s book, Captain Underpants. And the Perilous Plot of Professor Poopypants by Dave Pilkey. The evil Professor forces everyone to assume new names…
Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:
a = snickle b = doombah c = goober d = cheesey e = crusty f = greasy g = dumbo h = farcus i = dorky j = doofus k = funky l = boobie m = sleezy n = sloopy o = fluffy p = stinky q = slimy r = dorfus s = snooty t = tootsie u = dipsy v = sneezy w = liver x = skippy y = dinky z = zippy
Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:
a = dippin b = feather c = giggle d = burger e = chicken f = barffy g = lizard h = waffle i = farkle j = monkey k = flippin l = fricken m = bubble n = rhino o = potty p = hamster q = buckle r = gizzard s = lickin t = snickle u = chuckle v = pickle w = hubble x = dingle y = gorilla z = girdle
Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:
a = butt b = boob c = face d = nose e = hump f = breath g = pants h = shorts i = lips j = honker k = head l = tush m = chunks n = dunkin o = brains p = biscuits q = toes r = doodle s = fanny t = sniffer u = sprinkles v = frack w = squirt x = humperdinck y = hiney z = juice
Thus, for example, George W. Bush’s new name is Fluffy Chucklefanny. Now when you comment on this, be sure to include your new name!
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